I was at work last night and decided to call home to ask how the IEP meeting went. After a few minor comments Vick started to chuckle. I thought to myself, what in the hell could be so funny at an IEP meeting? I never encountered such humor when I attended them by myself. Maybe they were talking about me. Don't be so damned paranoid Mick. After all, it is a meeting about Samantha's education plan. And we all know that when Sam's name comes up there can definitely be some laughter(or minor anger) associated with it. Luckily it was something funny.
As I pulled into the driveway after work something didn't look right. I know, how in the hell can you tell something is different in the dark you say. Well after living with Sam for 13 years one gets used to seeing things that don't belong, even in the dark of night. It wasn't as if the object was defined as it was more of a shadow image. But definitely not supposed to be there. And there it was, staring right at me on the front porch. At first glimpse I thought it might be a dead animal. Man was I hoping I was wrong. We don't need critters straying to our house just to perform their last gasps. I can just imagine Sam carrying in a dead possum. I'm sure it would freak them all out it when it suddenly came back to life. Such is their name.
During our conversation Vick mentioned that the hot tub needed to be drained. I was planning on draining it as soon as I got home. You see, Sam has learned all about watercolors. She learned this little trick at school that has ended up being great fun for her. Not for us, for her! She learned how to pull the tips out of washable markers and squeeze the ink out into water. Why the school would teach an autistic mischievious girl this act is beyond me. I think the companies that make these markers should be sued for false advertising. They may be washable, but they leave the worst stain imaginable. Walls,clothes,plastic cups. These are just a few things that stain when she has her fun. Back to the hot tub. I'm surprised we haven't turned into smurfs. Because that is the color our tub has been for over a week. At least my skin hasn't stained yet. One also has to check their water glass to make sure it is clear. At least ink is better than peeing in my glass. Although pee is probably more sterile than the ink. I still refuse to drink either one. Shit that's a gross thought!
The thing on the porch didn't move at all as I turned off the truck's engine. I thought maybe it would run when I opened my door. The door on the drivers side of the truck really makes a grinding squeal when you open and close it. This is due to the hinge being tweaked a little. Since the truck is not worth putting any money into, it will just have to remain that way forever. No such luck for movement. Nobody leaves the porch light on for me so I couldn't see what it was for sure. After making a quick hiss at it, I came to the immediate conclusion that whatever it was, it was dead. I decided then to enter the side sliding door to avoid any stench that might come with whatever this thing was.
After putting my keys and everything else in my pockets away, I sat on the couch for a quick breather. I thought to myself, get the hot tub draining then go out and deal with whatever it is lying on the porch. So out the back door I went. The hose was right where I left it. Nicely coiled on the deck. I unwound the hose stretching it out into the gravel in front of our shop. I grabbed the female end of the hose and started marching towards the hot tub. Holy shit! Whatever was on the front porch had babies and they were all over our deck around our tub. I didn't know what to think. I dropped the hose and headed into the house. "Vick honey wake up", I whispered. She gave me that stare of how dare you but I was desperately wanting to know what had happened. As she sat up in bed wiping her eyes, the laughter started to build.....
The watercolor culprit waiting for her noodles at Olive Garden. Known to Sam as " Salad Garden "
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