Zeus and Louise contribute to the challenges of Spring Cleaning.
I was raised right. I don't know what happened, but I actually know better. Why I didn't turn out any better, I don't know. I'm talking about cleanliness being next to godliness. I confess that this looks like the house of a heathen. And I'm not sure why. It isn't that I don't care. I really do care--just not enough to be obsessive-compulsive about cleaning. Apparently I don't even care enough about cleaning to actually clean. However, let me state for the record, that we tend to be more messy than anything else. And yes, there is a little bit of dirt and dog hair, but we're not actually filthy. We are working to improve this. I'd like to aspire to my mother's standards.
As I said, I was raised right. You could have eaten off my mother's floors. There was no need for the five second rule. You could have given yourself a good 15 seconds except that the dog would have beaten you to the morsel. Actually, it's safer to eat off of my floors than my mother's. Hers are covered in nasty, harsh cleaning residue. Mine are simply covered in dirt and pet hair. Much safer.
It was unacceptable in my mom's house to have visible dirt. I was supposed to vacuum and dust every day after school--no visible dust, no specks of anything on the carpet. I think I was a bad seed from the start because this seemed really unreasonable to me back then. I would let it all go for two, maybe three days (if I was feeling really defiant and wicked). I wanted to see what I was cleaning. Dusting invisible dust was very unsatisfying. Plus Mom had lots of knick-knacks. I don't care how cute or stunning they are, I still detest knick-knacks.
Mom's theory was that if you could see dust or dirt, that meant your house was dirty. Of course, she is absolutely right. I miss living in a clean, no, I mean spotless, house. I want her to know that I really do (now) appreciate that I got to live in such a refreshingly sterile environment. And I really wish I could live up to the standard in which I was raised. Basically, there was never any gross shit at my mom's house. If company came over, there was never any secret horror at what one might find if they lifted up the toilet seat. ( Now, I keep trying to tell Mick, that since he is the only one that regularly lifts up the seat in this house full of women, it would be nice if he cleaned the toilet--and if he can't manage that, at least tell me when the toilet starts to ooze Black Death or Ebola virus or whatever other deadly filth might have taken root in the bathroom. I have no reason to lift the toilet seat, except out of morbid curiosity--you know, just in case I haven't received my daily dose of "gross").
While I'm singing my mom's praises, let me add that for most of my life, she worked full-time, plus made breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Mom's dinners were always eaten at the table; the table was set, and all the food was in serving dishes. That's right, no dishing up out of the pan; no eating out in the living room in front of the TV; there was always a knife, spoon, and fork (set in their proper places), whether you needed all three utensils or not; and we always sat down and ate together. Oh, God, I really have strayed off the path of righteousness. And the house was spotless!
The bar had been raised too high.
One of the nice things about the crappy economy is that it is now "in", it is now "chic" to be frugal. To be extravagant is socially unacceptable and is considered rather inconsiderate. So while everyone used to go to Daytona or Las Vegas or somewhere else for Spring Break, now not going anywhere is viewed as the socially responsible thing to do. I'm glad, because Mick is gone and I don't like to travel by myself. I don't even like driving to Salem and that's only ten miles away. Plus, like many, we need to be cheap right now. The good thing is that people can now be cheap without embarrassment or apologizing for it.
So what are the girls and I doing since we're spending their Spring Break at home? Apparently, we are learning a new skill. We are turning over that new leaf and giving Spring Cleaning a try. Carpets will be shampooed ( living room was today, bedrooms tomorrow), cupboards and drawers wiped out and reorganized, windows washed, cob webs eradicated, floors mopped (and baseboards sterilized--hey! I told you I was raised right), the dreaded dusting will take place in everyroom of the house, cabinets washed and polished, and then...I will actually sterilize all of the garbage cans, clean up my washer and dryer (take a look at yours, they get amazingly mungy!), and even wipe down my vacuum and shampooer. I am even going to lift up the toilet seats and see what dwells there that Mick didn't mention (or clean) before he left.
Yeah, yeah, it doesn't sound like a lot of fun unless you're obsessive-compulsive. Unfortunately, none of us in this household is. This is kind of an interesting experiment for me. Not to see if I know how to clean, because I do, but to see how much I can accomplish with the kids home and one of them having a deserved reputation for needing 24/7 supervision. Whenever I get on a roll, I need to stop and check Sam and make sure she hasn't tried to move into the neighbor's house seeking more fun and excitement. We will take breaks and go to the park ( a favorite thing), and I will be very good and take her to the pool a couple of times ( a very favorite thing--for Sam, it's more or less torture for me)). And since the outside of the house needs a good cleaning too, I think I'll hand over the pressure washer to Sam and let her blow the siding off the house.
So the girls and I are giving this cleaning thing a try. Six months from now we'll clean the house again. Whether it needs it or not.
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